dodgemyballs.net

The Best Diagram Ever

*Note: We use many more balls than what is displayed in the diagram.

Rules of the Game

Most Important Rule

• This is a gentlemen’s/ladies’ game. Honesty is encouraged, respect is not. In other words, don’t be a faggot.

In the beginning …

• Teams: Pick a side and go there. Teams will be adjusted so there’s an even number of people on each team. Good tip: always pick the opposite team of a guy named Doug.
• Before each round, each team lines up on their respective starting line.
• The team on the East side of the field (the side closest to the baseball field) ALWAYS yells go. Anyone on the team can yell go.
• As soon as the Eastern side yells go, both teams are permitted to run to midfield to retrieve the balls. You must take the ball back to your team’s starting line BEFORE you can throw the ball at the opposing team. You can also throw a ball back to a teammate who is at the starting line and have him/her throw it back to you.

… In the End

• The round is over when all members of one team are knocked out.
• When the round is over, teams switch sides.

Getting Knocked Out

• If you get hit by a thrown ball, guess what – YOU’RE FUCKING OUT. Even if you get hit on your hangnail on your pinky, you’re out. Since we don’t have the luxury of an esteemed dodgeball referee, we expect everyone to be honest about getting hit.
  • Exception: If you get hit in the head, it’s considered a head shot facial and you are NOT out because the humiliation alone is punishment enough. Feel free to make fun of anyone who gets blasted in the face.
  • Any ball deflected off of someone becomes dead. You cannot get knocked out by any balls deflected off of other people.
  • Any ball deflected off another ball becomes dead. You cannot get knocked out by any balls deflected off of other balls.
  • Any ball that is kicked becomes dead. You cannot get knocked out by any ball that is kicked. That is just homo.
  • No tagging bullshit. You must throw a ball at someone and you must enjoy it.
• If you throw a pussy throw at someone and they catch it, YOU ARE OUT.
  • Exception: If you throw The Pounder (see awesome diagram above) at someone and they catch it, you are NOT OUT.
  • If you catch a ball, one of your teammates is allowed to re-enter the game.
  • If a ball hits you, goes off the wall, and you catch it, don’t start celebrating because guess what – YOU’RE STILL OUT.
• If a ball is thrown at you and that ball causes you to drop the ball(s) you were using as a shield, YOU ARE OUT.

When You Get Knocked Out

• When you get knocked out, go to the end of the line of other teammates who are knocked out. If you’re the first one out, then lucky you. You’re the first one back in if any of your teammates catch a ball. The order of that line determines who gets to come back in next. E.g. First person in line comes back in if a teammate catches a throw. (See above diagram to find out where to line up)

Other Things to Know

• The entire field is fair game to run around in as long as you stay within the cone boundaries and out of the opposing team’s no-entry zone.
  • If you are in the opposing team’s no-entry zone as you are throwing, your throw won’t count if you hit anyone, you cheating douchebag.
• If you’re team is getting slaughtered, it is customary to complain that teams are unfair, but no one will care.
• If a ball accidentally ends up in the baseball field or just anywhere way off the field, the last person to touch it has to retrieve it.
  • Example 1: You make an embarrassing throw, and it goes over the fence. Bye bye – you get it.
  • Example 2: You get smacked hard enough for the ball to travel over the fence. You not only got schooled, you also get to take a nice jog and get the ball.
• Talking smack is strongly encouraged and welcomed.